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A Debate badly in need of a Story Editor

Tony Abbott was less likeable than Jonathan. Marion would have won top office if she had been running against Julia Gillard last night.

There were three Polliegraphs on Channel Seven, and two Worms on Nine, but still the Great Debate was as dull as dishwater.

The one hour gabfest was badly in need of a MasterChef Story Editor to put in a few cliffhangers, near-disasters and tear-jerking moments. Tony Abbott was less likeable than Jonathan. Marion would have won top office if she had been running against Julia Gillard last night. As orators these politicians were bland and lacked spontanaeity.

Seven had three “Polliegraphs” going for Male, Female and an Average. Nine had two Worms: Male and Female. I kept waiting for them to get it on and give birth to a baby Worm halfway through the show but it didn’t happen. So I made a cup of tea instead. That was more interesting. For a while there I couldn’t decide between Earl Grey and English Breakfast. I was rivetted. Earl Grey won out despite some noise in the background trying to upstage it.

Seven is said to have been unimpressed that its gender-based Polliegraphs had been hijacked by Nine’s gender-based Worms. Nine should have been more worried about its most-appalling sound for the whole thing. We have to listen to dull speeches, don’t make them any more torturous please?

I couldn’t help but wonder about the irony of electoral pledges to cut Immigration while the nation’s most talked about event was being won by an Australian of Asian heritage (and another was runner up last year), but then these Pollies aren’t very in touch with the masses.

After all, they needed a lot of convincing to move their Debate in the first place.

19 Responses

  1. ha ha David, most entertaining, unlike the show itself. I survived about 90 seconds then ran screaming to Modern Family. Glad to know that was a good call.

  2. how big are Julia’s ear lobes. I couldn’t stop staring at them. they were distracting me from what she was saying. I think everybody has got this election wrong; it’s not a gender election its an Ear Election. Do voters prefer big lobes or big ears

  3. I liked ABC’s version of the worm: a live cross to six bored people at Penrith RSL. Apparently everyone else went home to watch Masterchef.

  4. Maybe Gary, George and Matt should pick our next prime minister.

    I watched the debate late night on Ten with no graphs or worms… i can only imagine how distracting that would have been had Ten have included it in their screening.

  5. maybe 7 should come up with something original. like not having a worm or a polygraph. the pollygraph thing was exactly the same thing as worm and maybe they should stop false advertising everything and produce some decent television

  6. Couldn’t agree more about the debate – neither of them said anything they hadn’t already and the only thing I am thankful for is it was so boring it made both my kids fall asleep even before their final Masterchef Dance!

  7. I am really really hating the media in this election. They keep telling us the parties aren’t engaging the public and i think that is true but I believe it is because the media are all over every living breathing moment of the election with their pursuit of nonsensical coverage of everything.
    If the media backed off and let the public in rather than telling us what we should think, i think we would be better off.
    At the moment the media are controlling the whole damned thing and that is wrong !

  8. As a bit of a political junke I was actually looking forward to the debate, as ridiculous as that sounds, but even I was bored out of my mind. I can only imagine how somebody with little interest in the whole shamozzle survived longer than five minutes of pandering and nothingness.

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