Best Gogglebox lines: Nov 11


This week on Gogglebox families were unimpressed with Kitchen Cabinet and compelled by the drama of Bondi Vet.

But it was the Dalton Family dog that upstaged the lot of them…

The X Factor:
Does this guy have a job other than host X Factor? All he does is 10 minutes a week.
Dannii what did you do? You stupid cow.
Swearing in a PG timeslot? Business!
I will die if Natalie goes. I will literally die.
I’ms or bored I can’t feel for anybody.
They should just let the public decide all the time.
That’s what I call chicken shit
They sent Amelia home. Now they’ve sent Natalie home. What if they sent Dannii home?

Highway Patrol:
He’s off his tits.
Get a phone book. Put it on his rib and punch him.
Double or nothing.
He might get his own show out of this.

The Great Australian Bake-Off:
The most polite bloody show on TV.
Can you wake me up at the end.
Pav’s not a cake, Dad. We’ve been through this.
I’ve going to have an arse bigger than Kim Kardashian just looking at it.
On MasterChef they take two bites and they’re done.
That’s as good as a Touchdown.

Don’t Tell The Bride:
This show basically has the premise that blokes are idiots.
It’s princess the prostitute with a veil.
That’s the most hideous wedding I’ve ever seen, but I so want to be there.

Kitchen Cabinet:
This is where they try and make politicians into real people.
They can’t f***in’ run a country. What makes them thunk they can cook?
Christopher Paaaarn.
I reckon in half an hour we’ll want to punch his head in.
Whose idea was this? I want to know who the producer is…. I’ll write them a letter.
She’s as bored as we are.
He’s very camp isn’t he?

Bondi Vet:
Bondi Rescue Vet?
He’s really hot.
He’s going to die!
Shit… I can’t take this.
Imagine the convulsion for the lady when she gets the bill.

Sunday Night:
What if I told you we can hold all of the world’s information in a device the size of the palm of your hand. And what do we do? We look up pictures of cats.

Sex. Turn it up Faye, quick!
Let’s learn about the clitoris with mum.
This is full on.
Why are they blocking the porn? Show us the porn!
I’ve had so much mercy sex.


  1. Love it when they bag the big realities and say what we are all thinking – last week the block, this week the X factor – during results – “get on with it” and “time for the pregnant pause”

  2. Follow on from quote above after watching Highway Patrol, ‘He might get his own show out of this’.

    Quote of the series.

    ‘Oh, let’s hope so. I love it when you make stupid people famous’.

  3. Don’t forget Mick’s “I’m confused by it all” at the end.
    Di + Mick during the Catalyst segment = comedy gold.
    This show is just all kinds of brilliant.

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