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Dear Lachlan, seriously…

Dear Lachlan, TEN has always been the underdog of the three commercials, but hey, that's exactly why we've liked it.

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Dear Lachlan

In just a few short months you’ve gone from being deputy chairman of Prime Media to acting CEO of Ten Network Holdings. What a ride. And to be fair, none of us saw that one coming.

With James Packer (the bloke you had One.Tel with) and the obvious support of the majority of the Board, we’re now awaiting your next move.

We know you’re the good-looking Murdoch, although the lovely Elisabeth nearly out-Shines you. You’re married to the equally lovely Sarah (and a tip to TEN production crews check your audio feed is working or risk losing your contract) and you love your NRL and IPL.

But what is it you have in mind for TEN now that Mr. Falloon and Mr. Blackley are both effectively out of the picture?

TEN has had so many wonderful shows over the years. We grew up with The Young Talent Time, Prisoner, Good Morning Australia (both of them), The Early Bird Show, Wonder World, Carson’s Law, Neighbours, Perfect Match, The Comedy Company, and The Simpsons.

Then there was Rove, Big Brother and Australian Idol when Sunday nights were must-see TV. Remember Merlin telling Gretel to “Free the Refugees?” Remember Guy Sebastian singing “Climb Every Mountain” or Anthony Callea singing “The Prayer?” Remember “What The?” and “My Charader?” Remember Melrose Place “Tuesday Night’s a Bitch?” Remember The Panel?

They were fun times, Lachlan, even if sometimes they were a little hokey. The fun was that you never quite knew what might happen next because TEN always took a risk. Let’s not forget they were the first to dump the Sunday night movie, the first to say “dammit we’re gonna strip a cooking show in primetime,” and the first to say “we’re sticking with The 7PM Project and bugger the lot of you.”

More recently they’ve taken some risks with a dedicted Sports channel. I’m not especially into Sport but Lachlan I’m confused… why is it playing shows about logging, trucking and mining? What’s The Manchurian Candidate got to do with Sport?

And then there is the News experiment.

Like 7PM, a move of this magnitude will probably take a year to bed in. Many people have said they admire that George Negus is not going down the road of Today Tonight and A Current Affair, but there is debate over the suitability of the content to the timeslot. Numbers would suggest you have bigger problems with the 6:30 News (and why did you take Sandra Sully away from the rest of the country -we grew up with Sandra too). And moving the weekend News from 5pm to 6pm? Why?

I have no idea how you will meet your drama quota with 13 episodes each of Rush and Offspring. I enjoy both shows, but really….. I know there is more in the pipeline (including Inside Out), but we’ll be in March soon. Are you buying more NZ shows, or picking up more Aussie movies? Please explain.

I’m quite partial to some of the shows on ELEVEN: Dexter (if only I hadn’t seen it on Pay TV already), Nurse Jackie, Californication and The Simpsons -but honestly Lachlan, I don’t think I’ve seen a new Simpsons episode since your launch week.

And why are we moving all these shows around lately? Please make up your mind where The Good Wife, House, Glee, Modern Family, NCIS: LA and Lie to Me belong. We have lives to organise y’know? Better yet, just take Lie to Me off altogether.

On a positive note The Circle can sometimes be a breath of fresh air. That Chrissie Swan cuts right through the TV screen. Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation is consistent fun (yes, give Micallef a chat show too), and The 7PM Project has settled into a nice groove. MasterChef remains addictive TV.

TEN has always been the underdog of the three commercials, but hey, that’s exactly why we’ve liked it.

The other two have always brawled over prestige and then along comes TEN with bold ideas and those crazy promos with celebrities sitting around in a rehab circle. It takes nerve to go out on a limb like that. I’m not really sure if 2.5 hours of News was nerve or which focus group said it was a good idea, but I sure hope the Board hasn’t lost it’s nerve too. I know yesterday was probably a bit of power play, but hey, these are my shows you’ll be playing with, Lachlan.

There’s a bunch of other things I could throw in but let me leave you with one more thought: please pick up the phone to Hamish and Andy before it’s too late.

Cheers.

KINDLY LEAVE YOUR OWN “DEAR LACHLAN NOTE BELOW.”

91 Responses

  1. I quite like 6pm but I’m rarely home to see it. I’ve already read the headlines online so the nightly news is of little interest to me. If it was on at 6.30 a lot more people would be home to see it and it would be a welcome alternative to the current affairs garbage.

  3. Dear Lachlan

    Please keep Negus and Ten’s Evening News. I know the ratings aren’t good now, but they will get better, and you know you have a better product than the other commercial networks.

    And please buy the NRL rights for One off Nine (and potch Ray Rabbits Warren while you are at it). HD NRL would rule.

  5. Dear Lachlan

    I’d also like to reiterate – do not call Hamish and Andy. At all. Under any circumstances. They are as overrated as all get out. Even after they inevitably crash and burn on Nine (who won’t know how to handle them), don’t call them. I’m another person who likes your wife, so yeah, if you can fit her in somewhere, that would be good.

  7. Dear Lachlan, seriously…

    Don’t bring back Big Brother, please don’t bring it back. Just take some risks, keep the news hour, keep ONE HD, get some Aussie sci-fi on TV, some Aussie sit-coms, don’t fall into the “lets have more Australian Crime shows” but if you have to, set it in a different era.

  8. Dear Lachlan,
    U need to do 4 things:
    1. Call hamish and Andy and secure a deal
    2. Dump the boring sport shows on one and get bigger sport games e.g. Football from England and socceroos games, wwe ( I don’t like it but everyone else does), and get rid off golf noww
    3. Switch 6pm with george negus with the evening news, and if that doesn’t work then move 5pm news to 5:30…simple

    You can also Bring back big brother but in a different format, similar to what biggest loser is like with 4 nights a week instead of 6

    Oh yeah and your wifes hot!!! Lol

  11. Dear Lachlan

    Please don’t call Hamish & Andy. They are not funny any hopefully will fade away now they aren’t on radio 5 days a week. Aussie comedy does need a shot in the arm but these two are not the answer.
    Give the underrated Paul McDermott a late night show. he carries GNW and could be Australia’s own Letterman

  14. I think this will be a good move for Ten. Lachlan is a pretty smart operator (One.Tel excluded, but he was not the first person fooled by that dead set con artist, Jodee Rich) and I think he will do fine as an interim CEO. Ten is a great network, I have always admired it as it is a risk taker. Occasionally they pull off absolute blinders (Masterchef franchise, the Kennedy Miller mini-series of the ’80’s and 90’s) It should rate a lot better than it does as it has some real quality shows. I wish him the very best of luck.

  17. Perhaps cutting out all the embargos on TEN’s programming releases might help there be more time to promote what is happening on Ten? more time for viewers to get to know the line up when there are changes?

  18. Brilliant post David. Ten has been the underdog since we were told to “Go For 0!” back in the 1960s. But you’re right, we love the underdog. We love that they went out on a limb for The Mike Walsh Show (before he went to Nine), Number 96, The Box, Blankety Blanks, Prisoner, getting Neighbours from Seven. Having the guts to launch a one-hour news (see, taking a gamble with News can pay off!)… even for duds like Arcade, Holiday Island and Punishment which leave us baffled so many years on but we love the fact that sometimes they did get it so wrong.

    We remember Bob Shanks who probably had good intentions but instead gave us Family Double Dare. At least Larry Emdur is probably grateful for the gig as without it he’d probably not be getting $800k now.

    We remember the bomb blast at Number 96 and at E Street. And remember the era of the epic mini-series? Shows like Bodyline, The Dismissal, Bangkok Hilton, Vietnam, Heroes.

    We watched the Melbourne Cup on Channel 0 and then Ten for years. Lachlan’s dad Rupert secured Ten the rights to the 1984 and 1988 Olympic Games which we all watched.

    We’re grateful that they hired a young journalist called Jana and some of us perhaps less grateful that they hired another one called Eddie!

    Remember the string of morning shows, mostly featuring Roy Hampson in Melbourne, before Bert (and Moira) came along to beat Ten out of the recession. And we laughed at Bernard King and Pot ‘O’ Gold/Pot Luck.

    And most of all, in Melbourne, we love Mal! The last channel that tried to sack him paid dearly, so hang on to him!!

  19. @ Paul I agree; if there’s one ‘Dear Lachlan’ I would want to write; it’s definitely please bring back Big Brother. Sure people hated it but even in its shocking 2008 season when all went down the drain; people still talked about it and in today’s climate; the ratings it was getting were actually not as bad as some of the shows they have on now… no show has defined TEN as much as Big Brother; and Davit Mott wanted to steer clear of TEN being the ‘BB network’ but with a better format; Secret Story of that of Big Brother US; it is sure to capture a generation once more. Plus if you bring it back and its not a success maybe those bastards can have another crack of sending this tentpole off with a little more dignity and respect.

  22. A simole question..what does Murdoch know about programming?..having tons of money doesn’t mean you have programming skills, nor the creative skills that take risks

  24. Maybe plan a big re-launch to coincide with Masterchef. Settle on a good schedule and get your viewers and loyalty back. No more last minute channel Nine style programming changes. Work it out, and get it right and stick to it.

    Also – people watch TV all year round – not just the 40 weeks that ratings count for. Condier that when programming over summer and Easter.

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